Scheduling Sex Is a Good Idea, Actually—and Sex Therapists Agree

glamour.com:

. And often!It can be easy to forget that relationships take work, and work, like all things, requires time, effort, and planning—especially for sex.

Most things in life require preparation. Why should intimacy be any different? Without strategy, physical intimacy becomes theoretical; the “we should get together sometime!" of domesticity.

If you don't sit down and schedule it, it’s just not going to happen.“The more we intertwine our lives with logistics, finances, cleaning toilets, kids, work, etc., the less space we have for sexy stuff,” , MA, LMFT, licensed psychotherapist and founder of , tells Glamour. “Unless you’re committing to prioritizing your sexual connection and pleasure, it’s easy for it to get lost in the shuffle of life."That doesn't mean anything is “wrong” with your relationship though. “It is completely normal for couples in long-term relationships to go for long stretches of time without physical intimacy,” says , MA, LMFT, in-house relationship expert at . “What a ‘long time’ means depends deeply on the couple: for some that's a few weeks, for others it’s a few years.”Still, a sharp decline in sex is noticeable, and it can be tough to determine what needs to be done to get the spark back. “There are many, many reasons sex can decline in a relationship,” says sociologist and certified sexologist , PhD. "As time goes on in a relationship, we tend to have more responsibilities that take our time, energy, and focus." She points to children, work, and caregiving as examples.

Alternatively, it could be as simple as the dynamic having changed over time. “For instance, a couple may have enjoyed concerts or other events, where sex tended to occur after, but once they have kids there’s less time for a.