When my mum, Johannah Deakin, was suddenly taken away in December 2016, I completely bottled up my feelings. I was so new to this feeling of grief and I didn’t know how to deal with it.
I was only 18, which is a weird time in your life anyway.The first year was a really dark time. I lost my confidence, didn’t want to do anything and wasn’t myself at all.
I wasn’t mature enough to go out and get help. I wanted to deal with it on my own. I thought, “I’ll be fine. I can get through it.” I felt that getting any outside help was admitting defeat.
My sister, Félicité Tomlinson, then died in March 2019 – she had got herself into such a bad place and she never got any help.
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